It’s all planning now, no more 9 to 5, no more twiddling your thumbs while your arse spreads fatter on a swivel chair behind a desk. Can you wear heels on a Friday night now? Do you remember that she loves him, but he is with her, and everyone knows anyway but we all pretend we don’t, and that Mr George will be in at 2pm every day for his ‘Aqua Rouge’, a copy of the Guardian and the seat next to the window. Then there is Simon who is at his seat at the bar bang on 5.05pm, he has his special Fosters glass cause it tastes better in that. His wife will turn up at 5.15pm with a sneer on her face and then they will both do the Times crossword til 6pm. Then they wander into the night, to go do what real couples do.
And have you ever seen women who drink bitter lemon? A perfect description.
A wink here, a few free drinks there, the promise of the moon, a number on a barmat and we do it all over again tomorrow.
Goodnight folks, time at the bar.